i take the knife and slice through the flesh
the hot burn of the metal through my skin feels so comforting
filling the hole inside of me....thats been longing for pain

everyday i wake to your screams and whines
my only option aside from you is my room
locked inside my little room safe inside my head

the battle field is my home
where i sleep at night and where i wake only to cry
living through 24 hours of rage building up inside
only to start all over again

i beg of my maker please kill me and let me die
i dare not breathe the breath of someone who deserves it

press the off button on the side pannel
unplug my chord from the wall
and let me sit there idle with no movement or care at all

do not stop me i beg of you do not
i wish to swallow my tongue and choke ...simply falling with no gasp
or an everlasting death ...dying slowly with the worst pains not even known to man
tie me up and beat me 99 times ...let me bleed to death and watch the tears stream from my eyes

you scream at the innocent child who has done nothing
unbuckling your built and beating her raw so she bleeds
what a father you are.....what a mother you are....what a family you are to her....
she does everything in her power to please you and you reward her with unforgiving pains...

she is grown up and in a few years she will be gone...far away from you both
never to return and never wishing to speak your names
loving you somewhere beneath the suffering
but do you love her?

blessed screams as she falls upon her knees
begging to know who you were...
but you look down on her in guilt and shame...
and she never deserved your pain....


dedicated: to teenagers,children and young adults who have suffered or been abused physically or mentally....youre never alone